Think Happy. Be Happy.

Although it may not be lingering in the back of people's minds, it's certainly front and center in my mind.  How am I feeling?  I feel like I'm constantly evaluating and re-evaluating how I feel.  Honestly, although it's not stressful per-say, it is exhausting.

Let's see if I can sum things up for those of you who may be wondering.  I have heartburn, badly.  We've gone through all the Tums we had in house, and are on our second tube of the ones we picked up at a gas station.  I'm tired.  As in, I-can't-hold-my-head-up anymore tired.  I'm emotional, often crying at inopportune, and sometimes inappropriate, situations.  Nothing like watching a preview to a completely innocent movie and bursting into tears without knowing exactly why.  Not comfortable, believe me -- it's happened several times in the past couple of days.  I'm mostly headache-free, which is new for me.  I did have a headache yesterday to beat the band, but I think that had more to do with a bout of crying that came before that.  Took nearly 24 hours to get rid of using only Tylenol, but guess what?  I did it!  My body is also uncomfortable.  From aches and pains, cramps and twinges, to just feeling "off," my body is trying to tell me something.

Here's the problem:  I know I'm not crazy.  But I don't know that I'm pregnant.  Due to the progesterone I take on a daily basis, these could all just be symptoms of my body thinking that it's pregnant.  Isn't that the pits?  I want to believe it worked.  I pray that it worked.  But, I'm afraid to get my hopes up too high.  I haven't tested yet, and I don't plan to prior to going in for the blood test on Wednesday morning.  

Tomorrow I start my biochemistry class at UWM.  Bright and early at 8:00 a.m. I will be continuing on this nursing adventure.  I just read through the safety PowerPoint they provide and was relieved to find an asterisk with information on what a pregnant woman should do regarding the labs.  Luckily, it seems that precautions can be taken ahead of time for those of us who are good communicators (no worries there, right?).  This class meets daily, Monday through Thursday.  In addition to that, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have the laboratory section as well as a discussion.  Luckily on Wednesday, the most important day on our calendars in the foreseeable future, I am done at 9:15 a.m.  So, that means that we will be heading straight from UWM to Froedtert's lab in order to have the blood drawn for the test.  

And, I'm not sure how, but we will be doing some kind of a reveal.  Here's to hoping it's a happy, I-can't-wait-to-share, wonderful news reveal.  For now I'm going to continue to "think happy."  I've learned in the past that this points me in the right direction for "being happy."  Don't get me wrong, I'm excited.  I'm also nervous, which is why I need to stop the worrying and just "think happy."  We're going to believe this into being, one way or another.  Until Wednesday...