Being Thankful

What a day!  I went back and forth about whether or not to post today as I am completely and utterly exhausted, but decided to humor my reader(s?) by posting in case someone is checking in.  Today began with a running start -- literally!  Our morning at Milwaukee School of Languages started with a Code Blue.  This means there is a medical emergency in the building.  Normally, when we hear this announcement it is followed by the word "drill."  Not today.  I am part of the response team, and we just had a meeting two days ago regarding our timeliness in responding to a Code Blue.  After busting my butt to get upstairs (and almost creating a second Code Blue when I almost fell UP the stairs), I quickly arrived at the scene of the trouble.  I think there are few things more difficult than seeing someone you know in a medical struggle/emergency.  I spent four and a half years as an EMT Basic and EMT IV Tech...and cannot say that I am unaffected by emergencies, particularly when they befall people I see on a day-to-day basis.  Obviously, the closer you are to someone the more difficult it becomes to be there and work in a semi-professional manner to help them in their time of need.  I am happy to say that only a few tears were shed by this broad who's pumped full of all kinds of hormones from my procedure last week.  And, I am even happier to say that I believe all involved in this morning's events made it where they needed to be in order to receive the help they needed.  Scary while it was happening...but it was nice to see that all of our drills paid off and we were able to help someone who needed it.

The day didn't seem to slow down until my last class of the day.  And when I say slow down, I mean that nearly half my class showed up late.  Again.  I have yet to figure out how to impart on our dear youth that being on time is a life skill that will prove worthwhile once they hold down "real" jobs.  So how did I spend my evening, you ask?  While I was on my way to take my practical exam for Anatomy and Physiology, I made thirteen phone calls to thirteen different households regarding the aforementioned tardies.

I made it to class on time and proceeded to not do very well on my exam.  I studied.  I practiced.  And I just feel like it wasn't enough.  Time will tell, but for this self-proclaimed perfectionist it might be a tough pill to swallow when I receive my final grade.

I realize my post began with what may sound like complaints.  For this, I apologize.  Although I try to be mindful to never take things for granted, I think we are all a little more aware in the month of November due to the upcoming holiday.  It's rare that I don't see someone doing some sort of being thankful challenge on Facebook -- I thoroughly enjoy reading about others' moments of thanks because they always seem to spark my own thoughts on what I have to be thankful for.  And that is what I wanted this post to be about.

Something happened to Tony and I the other day that I never could have predicted.  I never thought that sharing our story would result in anything more than me relieving some stress and venting so that I wasn't avoiding some of what I am feeling while we travel this trying road of infertility.  There is no way to set this up so that it's not so impressive, so I'm just going to say it:  I received a message the other day from a friend of mine offering to donate her eggs to Tony and I.  I was floored.  He was shocked.  What a generous offer!  I am still struggling to understand how we got so lucky to be the recipients of that kind of generosity.  Though she will remain unnamed, I hope she knows how thankful we are.  Even if it never works out, if we don't need them or end up not being able to afford the process, the gift of HOPE this person has given us is unmeasurable.  The fact that someone is willing to reach out to me, on what some may call a sensitive subject, and offer the most precious gift has left me speechless.  The fact that we have an alternative treatment option (that might end up being less expensive than the two I mentioned the other day) is like a secondary gift that we've received.

In closing, I'd like to say that I'm thankful to all of you who read this blog (even if "you" are only one person!).  I'm thankful to have friends and family who give Tony and I such unconditional love and support as we continue on this journey.  I'm thankful to have my best friend by my side every day when I go to sleep and each morning when I rise.  I'm thankful to have faith and a Heavenly Father whom I am learning to trust more and more every day.  And finally, I am thankful to finally be living what "let go and let God" really means -- it is amazing how good it feels to give the load I was carrying to Him!